i contain multitudes of data

This is part 3 of an ongoing series about the Internet. Previously, I explored the positive role that social media can play in modern life and bemoaned how e-commerce has bastardized the art of writing. I don't have future posts planned for this series, but stay tuned several years from now for my Silicon Valley… Continue reading i contain multitudes of data

these changes ain’t changing me

It occurs to me now that this story is wasted on the young. As a child, I found it overwrought. Then again, I was the kind of insufferable pedant who insisted on pointing out that I was ten and a half or turning thirteen next month. To me, the delta between just-turned-twelve and twelve-plus-eleven-months was… Continue reading these changes ain’t changing me

freshman disorientation

Nothing prepared me for the first time that I tried to walk from one building on Vassar's campus to another alone. It was before smartphones or even the proper signage that the fire department recently forced the college to install. I was hell-bent on finding my own way, no way was I going to ask… Continue reading freshman disorientation

a deluxe apartment in the sky

After college, I landed in an apartment that my father once, memorably, called “a warehouse for twentysomethings.” Warehouse is generous: it was a converted four-bedroom with a single, decrepit bathroom and no air conditioner. I found my room on Craigslist shortly after arriving in New York where I discovered quickly and to my chagrin that,… Continue reading a deluxe apartment in the sky

fievel goes east

“I'm getting cockles,” I say. My dad looks at me like I just said I was ordering the insect protein. To his credit, he doesn't recommend that maybe I ought to stick with the same buttered pasta I've been eating since I started in on solid foods fifteen years earlier. “Nice!” he says. I'm sixteen… Continue reading fievel goes east

american idiot

"D'ya want [incomprehensible noise]?" "Um, I'm sorry, what?" "D'ya want [incomprehensible noise]?" "I'm--um--sorry, one more time?" "D'ya want [incomprehensible noise]?" "I... no. No, thanks."   I am in London, in a cafe on Charlotte Street, where I learn in short order that drip coffee is an American thing, and there is something else that I could… Continue reading american idiot

rumplestiltscass

My parents almost named me Georgia. I’m convinced that if I had grown up a Georgia instead of a Dana, I would have been infinitely more glamorous. Instead being Dana, five foot two with a Buddha belly, wearing leggings and pink Converse high-tops and one of those T-shirt that might lead well-mannered straphangers to give… Continue reading rumplestiltscass

there and back again

When I think of anorexia, I think of Karen Carpenter. Like every normal teenage girl who came of age in the 1970’s, I idolize Karen Carpenter (I, unfortunately, grew up in the 2000s, which makes the “normal” qualifier irrelevant). But only insofar as I would give my right arm to feather my hair and belt… Continue reading there and back again

the butterflies are still there

Ten years ago, I had a flawless first date. I have no qualms about bragging about this because none of my other firsts have been so storybook-perfect. My first kiss startled me so much that instead of kissing back, I hiccupped. My first relationship ended in a hotel room and not even in an exciting… Continue reading the butterflies are still there

squirrel!

I am a nervous Nellie. Always have been and since no matter how passionately I beg, my doctor refuses to write me a prescription for intravenous Xanax, always will be. I've outgrown a few of my fears: when I was a little girl (okay, until I was like, sixteen and driving myself), the bumpy span… Continue reading squirrel!