an update from the couch

I’ve spent the majority of the past two days in my apartment on my couch waiting for various deliveries… the vast majority of which didn’t come, so fuck that noise. I left this morning to go to the Bed Bath and Beyond/Marshalls/TJ Maxx on 18th and 6th and had to powerwalk back because the Fed Ex guy arrived with my mattress six hours earlier than he arrived with my bed yesterday. However, he waited for me AND carried it up all four flights of stairs, so he is my new best friend. I wish I could have taken a picture of him as my photo of the day.

Today in New York, I learned that if you wear your Vassar sweatshirt with your jeans and boots instead of your down jacket, you get a lot more catcalls. Also, if you powerwalk, a deliveryman will tell you that he doesn’t like that run.

I’m starting to think that I could convert this entire blog into “Dana Gets an OkCupid Profile” and parlay that into the book deal/talk show/lifelong fame of which I’ve always dreamed. If I had more time on my hands and a great deal more balls than I’ve been blessed with, I would start a blog in which I met every single person who messaged me and detailed the adventures that ensued… but instead I think I’ll just post screenshots of all my favorites, because that way I don’t have to meet this guy:

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